If you don’t have a lot of time…you may want to revisit this as this might take up some time. A lot on my mind but I feel an end is due…
I recently told Tiffany that I didn’t feel as if I wanted to continue my blog. She suggested I owed readers one final post. As usual she is right so I wanted to sum up my experience in this final post. I was telling her that I just don’t feel as if I am the type of writer that can post the in and outs of our daily lives. She does so wonderfully on her blog but it’s just not my style. So in this final message, I wanted to capture a few final thoughts.
Life has changed dramatically but at the same time, it hasn’t changed at all. Our son has given us all we have wanted and strived for over the last few years and even though we are only six weeks into this, I can confidently say it has been well worth the wait. I often look at kids that are celebrating their second or third birthdays and wonder how like would be had things worked differently from the beginning but Liam has helped erase a lot of those thoughts and each time I hold him, it makes me appreciate the journey that much more.
I am sure like many expecting parents, I was unsure how I would be as a parent and there are still many remaining questions but there is one thing I know for sure…I am as prepared for this as I can be. I know it in one simple way…I didn’t ask for help.
Let me explain…I lost my father almost four years ago. He was my mentor, my confidant, and my idol. My trust in him grew as the year’s past and my appreciation for him seemed to hit new levels as year’s past. He was a man of great knowledge and experience and I only learned to draw from those great resources as I grew in age. I learned to appreciate his vast knowledge of life and always used him as my sounding board as I encountered many of life’s problems. Once he was no longer around to use as a sounding board, I found myself often searching for answers.
I will never forget the time I decided to put a pressure reducing valve on the main water line even thought I knew little about the process. I assumed my limited knowledge of pluming would be enough but just to be sure, just before I started the project, I closed my eyes and quietly said, “Dad, if you are around, it would be great if you could give me a hand with this to walk me through this.” I had installed the unit and thought I had done it as well as could be expected but as soon as I turned the line back on, sure enough I had a leak. For the life of me, I couldn’t find the source of the problem. I started to lose faith in his ability to still guide me. Without answers, I finally called a plumber who came to the rescue and showed me the quick and simple way to finish off the project. Once the plumber left the house, I stood in front of my aided work and realized, he will always be with me and this instance was no exception. He was one to always allow me to fall flat on my face…but he always ensured the fall only made me stronger. He always made it a learning experience for me and at that moment I realized the lesson he taught me, life will always present to you dilemmas, it’s the learning you gain from the experience that you will carry on forever.
Fast forward to the birth of Liam. It wasn’t like installing drywall or some of the various other experiments I had tried in the past and asked for his help. About three weeks into Liam’s arrival, I realized I hadn’t even thought to stop and ask Dad for his guidance and mentorship in the process. I knew that the wealth of knowledge that he shared with me over the years will be a foundation of which I will use to bestow upon Liam as the year’s past. His shinning example of parenting, unlike my pluming skills, is something I gained innately from him over the year’s and look forward to bestowing those experiences on to Liam as he grows in age.
I am so proud of everything Tiffany has sacrificed over the year’s to get us to where we are today. Marriage will surely change as Liam grows in age but I am confident that our past experiences and unwavering love will guide us through all of the challenges that await us. I am proud to be her husband and in summery, I am proud to a father. A title my father showed me is earned, not given, and I look forward to proving myself as the father that he was and I strive to be.
E-I-G-H-T!?!?
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Eight. 8. Ocho. Anyway you say it, I don't like it. Eight definitely
removes any chances of being called a baby. Eight means going into third
grade. E...
13 years ago
3 comments:
tears...tears...
I'm going to miss your entries. I love to read what you write. Perhaps you can write me letters instead.
It is a shame you will no longer be blogging Matt, you're such a wonderful writer. But if you must end it, what a perfect last post.
Liam is lucky to have such a thoughtful daddy! Maybe you could write him letters too.
It was nice while it lasted. Maybe you will change your mind. I certainly won't hold it against you to write something profound and thoughtful every once in a while.
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